the MUTANT vol 3 issue 8
3-1-2000
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This Week's Identify That Movie Quote:
"The girl of my dreams... is a vegetable!"

(answer to last issue's quote: Kid, "The Princess Bride")
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Hey spazoids,

Whew!  I am beat.  After completing a three-week book tour for MRFH, I
have returned home.  Then I find out that, technically, there was no book.
And many of the radio stations and talk shows I burst in on are filing
lawsuits.  And I forgot where I live.

But that doesn't stop me from getting the best of Mutant Reviewers From
Hell straight to you, whoever you are.  And what better to start with than
some old-fashioned reviews?  We've got Batman the Movie, Indian Summer,
The Ref, Dogma, Austin Powers 2, Footloose, Pink Floyd The Wall, American
Beauty, Scream 3, and South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut.  I'm sorry we
don't have more reviews!  We'll try better next time!  I promise!  We'll
sacrifice Tina to the volcano god at the full moon!

The biggest new news is that the first month of the 3rd Annual Mutant
Awards has passed, and I'm extremely pleased to see that so many of you
voted.  Evil Dead 2 wins "Best Zombie Film", and March ushers in voting
for Best End Credits in a cult film.  It's always good to know that there
are people out there with taste who care enough to vote for their favorite
cult film that warms their heart, even though MRFH is directly
blackmailing you to get it done.

We're never short on features, and this past month we've got the brand-new
Mutant Correspondant Application form set up, and "Justin's Guide To
Elimination Movies".  Also, I got really really bored one night and
created a comic strip for MRFH that makes no sense, not unless you're high
on paint thinner.  In any case, we present the first three strips of "MRFH
Casting Couch".

What?  You want more from me?  You savage!

It wouldn't be a new month without me starting to write a new book.  I've
started to write so many books that, combined, they would outdo the
thickness of Moby Dick.  And War & Peace.  But this month brings something
different, something new, something... you can get behind.

I love quotes.  Particularly movie quotes.  And what better, then, to
create a book of your favorite cult movie quotes, categorized and ready
for your perusal?  Trust me, there are precious few movie quote books as
it is, and plenty that don't contain the wisdom of the likes of Army of
Darkness, Say Anything, or Clerks.  Time to change that.  I've launched
into a massive project to collect and organize movie quotes from dozens of
cult films into a book that will hopefully hit the shelves somewhere near
you.

Now, here's where I need your help.  I can get a lot of the quotes, but
I'm sure I'll miss them here and there.  If you would kindly take a few
minutes out of your schedule of skinning ferrets or whatever you do, and
e-mail me your favorite cult quotes (no matter from what cult movie or how
obscure!), I would be very grateful.  Plus, I'd put your name in the book
as a contributor.  Send all quotes to:

bigbanana@hotmail.com

Take care, MRFHites!  If we haven't told you how much we love you lately,
well, be glad.  It's kinda freaky when total strangers do that.

Head Mutant Justin